Sydney’s Grace – A Must Read.
If you’re going to read any post of mine this week or in the next few weeks you should read this one. Some of our friends still birthed their daughter 4 years ago. In their post they share about their suffering, God’s grace, the Gospel and how all this lead up to them now pursing adoption.
Ian is our drummer at church and used to be in this band called Soular, no doubt he’s the best drummer you will have a chance to listen to… I sincerely mean that. Anyways, he has been working on “Sydney’s song” for quite some time and it’s finally ready. The cool thing about it is that they are giving all the proceeds to help families adopt from our church. You can listen to the song here:
Here are some of the thoughts shared on their post, but you can read the whole thing HERE.
For some time after Sydney died, Ian and I each chose to grieve differently. One out loud and publicly and the other keeping it inside. And then Ian heard music. In his head, it would not leave. He began losing sleep and driving himself crazy with this heaven sent tune. He could not get it out of his head. That melody. Unending. And in the beginning, we weren’t ready or able to say Hallelujah and truly mean it…Hallelujah for death? Of a sweet little baby? How could that be?
Two years later, Ian began putting this “head music” together in the form of a song. Collecting sweet talented friends of ours. asking me to write the lyrics. Adding this year long melody with his amazing talents on the drums and in a large group effort with many we love, he began crafting Sydney’s Song. A song that Ian felt was about her. Her life and death and it’s impact on us. A song that would help him heal and move forward in restoration and reconciling his little girl’s death to a good God. Over that 3rd year, Ian began to see how Sydney’s Song was not supposed to be about her as much as it was to be about the One who ordained all of her days and how it was He that would bring the healing, not just songwriting, to him. Ian shared with me these thoughts and we both agreed that we needed to rework the song. I rewrote the lyrics, kept some of the original but we both agreed this song would be a praise song, not just a lament one. A worshipFULL song, not just a mourning one. And most importantly, this song was God’s. Not Ian’s. Not ours, not even hers. But God’s song. For Him and about Him and what He does with grief battered torn up hearts because of death.
Because of the death of a little girl. Because of the death of a Savior and ultimately the death of our own sin at the Cross…
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God takes disgusting ugly death and transforms it into beauty, into restoration and reconciles it.. through the Cross, because of a Savior, eternal life, the end of sin in heaven? Yes!!! But also here. On earth and in hearts that walk in the now not yet season…He can take the bad, the painful and the sad and renew it and transform it into a thing of Grace that solely brings glory to Himself. All the while, drawing others to Him.
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We are joyfully glad and proud to announce that we have answered the call to adoption. Our journey to this point has been a long one, a painful one, a life changing one, and a God focused one. This is not plan B for us simply because we can’t have anymore kids. This is God’s plan A for our family. It always was. We are certain, that our family is called to care, serve, love and bring a home to one of His fatherless children. To make things right? No. To replace her? No. Never. Because we cannot have anymore children biologically? No. Simply because that is gospel is why.
“Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.”
James 1:27To love and care for his orphans is the most beautiful image of gospel love, of redeeming love and restoring love. And life changing love and heart transforming love. We want to be a part of that and help others that are passionate about it’s message as well! We might not have walked this path had we not lost our Sydney. Or maybe we would have, only God knows..Death did teach us about God’s restorative love though. And adoption is restorative love at it’s finest..Just as God adopted us into His heavenly family, we chose adoption here on earth…I do know we can say that our sweet baby girl’s life and death has influenced and shaped our hearts, as we in our loss, reach out in love to bring a fourth child into our family, a precious child that has experienced it’s own loss as well. We long to reconcile that hurt and loss of theirs and have God redeem it by uniting us all as a family.
“Father to the fatherless, defender of widows — this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families.”
Psalms 68:5-6
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